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Surely you invoke the negative energy that's effecting the vibes???
Nov. 19th, 2025 11:19 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
oursin posting in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png){kind=small}
agonyauntThe yoga studio where I teach hasn’t been paying me on time (AAM: 4th one down):
I’ve been teaching yoga for about four years now and was hired for my first job at this small group training facility. I teach once a week and often sub for one of the two other instructors. I previously got paid monthly. I have a full-time job and this is my side gig. So, it’s money I use for things like gifts, or save up for vacations.
Over the last two years, my monthly payment stretched to being paid every two months. This past year, it’s stretched out to being paid every four or five months. I’ve asked the owners several times to leave a check for me for next week. I’ve also asked if there is an easier way for them to pay me, such as Venmo or direct deposit.
I’m at the point now where I’m owed for over 21 classes ($40 per class). Enrollment in the small training groups seems to have dropped as I’m seeing new members less. People do join for the yoga-only package to come to the yoga classes. What’s the best way to ask to be paid and let them know I can’t/shouldn’t have to wait longer than two months for payment? I’m at the point now where I want to say that I won’t teach until I get paid, but that isn’t really my vibe.
Alison responds: ( saying that you won’t teach until you get paid should be your vibe )
Wednesday 19/11/2025
Nov. 19th, 2025 08:58 amdark_kana posting in 3_good_things_a_day1) had a great day yesterday in my favorite theme parc ^^
2) good colleagues
3) lunch with hubby
Tuesday 18/11/2025
Nov. 18th, 2025 12:41 pmlhune posting in 3_good_things_a_day1) I feel completely better again, the illness yesterday was a one day thing
2Lunch at a sunny spot in the city
3) Visit to the library
2Lunch at a sunny spot in the city
3) Visit to the library
(no subject)
Nov. 17th, 2025 05:40 pmconuly posting in agonyauntDEAR HARRIETTE: My boyfriend recently moved in with me, and ever since then, my cat’s behavior has completely changed. She’s been acting out: scratching furniture, hiding for hours and even refusing to eat sometimes. She used to be calm and affectionate, but now she seems anxious and territorial. My partner is trying to be patient, but I can tell he’s getting frustrated, especially since the cat hisses at him whenever he walks by or tries to sit near me. It’s creating tension between us, and I feel stuck in the middle trying to keep everyone happy. I’ve tried introducing them slowly, giving the cat space and even buying new toys to distract her, but nothing seems to help. My boyfriend thinks I’m overreacting and that the cat will “get over it,” but I know she’s genuinely stressed.
I feel guilty because I was so excited for us to finally live together, and now it feels like we’re both walking on eggshells around my pet. I love them both, but I’m starting to wonder if this living situation is sustainable. How can I help my cat adjust to this big change without it putting more strain on my relationship? -- Standoff
( Read more... )
I feel guilty because I was so excited for us to finally live together, and now it feels like we’re both walking on eggshells around my pet. I love them both, but I’m starting to wonder if this living situation is sustainable. How can I help my cat adjust to this big change without it putting more strain on my relationship? -- Standoff
( Read more... )
Monday 17/11/2025
Nov. 17th, 2025 04:12 pmdark_kana posting in 3_good_things_a_day1) a training at work, good to see all the colleagues, but easy working from home the afternoon ^^
2) reading and working on crochet projects :-)
3) Pizza for dinner
Sunday 16/11/2025
Nov. 16th, 2025 10:39 amlhune posting in 3_good_things_a_day1) Had a lie-in this morning because I could (in my previous life I must have been an animal that hibernates during winter ^^)
2) Dinner at my parents’s place where I’ll probably curl up in front of the wood burner
3) A delicious hot chocolate :P
2) Dinner at my parents’s place where I’ll probably curl up in front of the wood burner
3) A delicious hot chocolate :P
Tech adaptation.
Nov. 15th, 2025 11:15 pmhannahAs I told several people I would, today I cleaned my computer. The physical object. I got the Q-tips, the Isopropyl, the canned air, the screwdriver set, watched a couple of videos and read some manuals, and got to work. It was a delightfully straightforward set of tasks and, unless I'm running a hyper-specific program that has moments of taking up 100% of the CPU, my computer's now nice and quiet. The only issue I've got right now is the front LED is blinking in an irregular frequency, which tells me one of two things: a physical component needs to be replaced at some point, or the LED itself isn't working properly. Absolutely nothing I've done so far today has caused me any further issues, so I'm not going to worry too much. I'll see what happens the next time I get the urge to play Stardew Valley.
Also of note, though much less pleasant, was having to bear through a couple anxiety spikes. It's been a while and I'm out of practice with them, and I haven't forgotten how they keep lingering. I hope it's all gone by tomorrow.
Also of note, though much less pleasant, was having to bear through a couple anxiety spikes. It's been a while and I'm out of practice with them, and I haven't forgotten how they keep lingering. I hope it's all gone by tomorrow.
Saturday 15/11/2025
Nov. 15th, 2025 10:33 amlhune posting in 3_good_things_a_day1) Tulips to bring a bit of very early Spring in my living room
2) Clean bedlinen for tonight
3)Creative afternoon It became a pilates lesson because the paper was still wet
2) Clean bedlinen for tonight
3)
Ask a Manager: let’s hear from people who didn’t find their career paths until after 40
Nov. 15th, 2025 03:20 am
Um what
Nov. 14th, 2025 01:36 pmysobel posting in agonyauntDear Miss Manners: What is the polite way to eat large sushi rolls? Sometimes they’re too big to comfortably eat whole without gagging!
Dissect them.
Miss Manners does not usually condone deconstructing food in public, but these are desperate times. Use your chopsticks to pull out the insides and eat them separately. Then either squish the remaining rice and seaweed together and eat it in two bites or use the side of the chopstick to cut it in half.
Perhaps the sight of their beautiful creations being desecrated will inspire the chefs to make more manageable bites. Or at least have them wonder why everyone is suddenly ordering them as takeout instead.
Dissect them.
Miss Manners does not usually condone deconstructing food in public, but these are desperate times. Use your chopsticks to pull out the insides and eat them separately. Then either squish the remaining rice and seaweed together and eat it in two bites or use the side of the chopstick to cut it in half.
Perhaps the sight of their beautiful creations being desecrated will inspire the chefs to make more manageable bites. Or at least have them wonder why everyone is suddenly ordering them as takeout instead.
Harriette continues to be the worst
Nov. 14th, 2025 09:28 amconuly posting in agonyauntDEAR HARRIETTE: A friend and I were watching a popular TV series together. The show is based on high schoolers who struggle with substance use disorder, mental health, anger management, sexual exploitation and more. We both were making comments regarding our shock throughout the episodes, but at some point, my friend looked over to me and said he feels sorry for my future children. I was wounded. That is such a strong statement.
I tried to unpack with him what he had said, but I didn't get far. He shared that he thought my expectations were too aggressive and that no kid will be able to thrive around me. I think of parenting as a balance between structure and vulnerability, and I've always hoped I will be an honest and understanding mom. Neither of us has children, by the way.
I want my friend to know his harsh critiques impacted me and that he should be more mindful with his opinions in the future. Is it even worth revisiting this conversation? -- Bad Mom
( Read more... )
I tried to unpack with him what he had said, but I didn't get far. He shared that he thought my expectations were too aggressive and that no kid will be able to thrive around me. I think of parenting as a balance between structure and vulnerability, and I've always hoped I will be an honest and understanding mom. Neither of us has children, by the way.
I want my friend to know his harsh critiques impacted me and that he should be more mindful with his opinions in the future. Is it even worth revisiting this conversation? -- Bad Mom
( Read more... )
Thanksgiving
Nov. 14th, 2025 05:02 amconuly posting in agonyaunt1. Dear Eric: For the last 45 years or so I’ve hosted Thanksgiving for my family. I’ve had as many as 25 people. My sister has two sons, and they’ve always stayed with me. Quite frankly, it’s now an issue. Only one son comes but he now has three sons of his own, ranging from 22 to 8. My sister also stays with me. They come on Wednesday and stay till Friday. It’s a lot considering all I have to do for the holiday.
I know if I say something about a hotel, they will be highly insulted.
My daughter also comes and stays, but that’s different. She’s one person and my daughter. Advice?
– Overwhelmed
( Read more... )
****
2. Dear Prudence,
My brother has good relationships with everybody but refuses to be part of Thanksgiving, Christmas, or large group events because he says that while he loves us individually, we’re a nightmare collectively. I get it and, frankly, I would love to do the same—my parents and wider family are lovely but bicker and squabble when they get together, particularly over politics, which gets ever uglier. But I also know that my family finds his attitude deeply hurtful. I’m stuck between wanting to opt out myself or trying to persuade him to change his mind because I can see how sad it makes my mother. My instinct is to stay out of it; we’re all adults. But I also feel a bit jealous and miffed. Is there a way forward?
—Stuck in the Middle
( Read more... )
****
3. Dear A.J.,
My husband’s brother, “George,” is a recovering alcoholic. He’s been sober for eight months. The thing is, Thanksgiving is coming up, and we’ve always served wine with dinner.
My husband thinks it would be completely inappropriate for us to do so this year because George is coming over, and he doesn’t want him to be “tempted.” I understand that George is going to be battling his alcoholism for the rest of his life, but at the same time, he can’t expect the world around him to be dry everywhere he goes and needs to be able to navigate settings where alcohol is served. This is turning into a sticking point between my husband and me. Is my husband right? Am I being thoughtless?
—Warring Over Wine
( Read more... )
I know if I say something about a hotel, they will be highly insulted.
My daughter also comes and stays, but that’s different. She’s one person and my daughter. Advice?
– Overwhelmed
( Read more... )
2. Dear Prudence,
My brother has good relationships with everybody but refuses to be part of Thanksgiving, Christmas, or large group events because he says that while he loves us individually, we’re a nightmare collectively. I get it and, frankly, I would love to do the same—my parents and wider family are lovely but bicker and squabble when they get together, particularly over politics, which gets ever uglier. But I also know that my family finds his attitude deeply hurtful. I’m stuck between wanting to opt out myself or trying to persuade him to change his mind because I can see how sad it makes my mother. My instinct is to stay out of it; we’re all adults. But I also feel a bit jealous and miffed. Is there a way forward?
—Stuck in the Middle
( Read more... )
3. Dear A.J.,
My husband’s brother, “George,” is a recovering alcoholic. He’s been sober for eight months. The thing is, Thanksgiving is coming up, and we’ve always served wine with dinner.
My husband thinks it would be completely inappropriate for us to do so this year because George is coming over, and he doesn’t want him to be “tempted.” I understand that George is going to be battling his alcoholism for the rest of his life, but at the same time, he can’t expect the world around him to be dry everywhere he goes and needs to be able to navigate settings where alcohol is served. This is turning into a sticking point between my husband and me. Is my husband right? Am I being thoughtless?
—Warring Over Wine
( Read more... )
Terrible families!
Nov. 14th, 2025 05:01 amconuly posting in agonyaunt1. Dear Eric: I am in my late 30s. I live halfway across the country from my parents, and don't have the best relationship with them. I also have a brother four years younger than me who I have been estranged from for 20 years.
My brother doesn't live with my parents, but he lives in the same city my parents do. If I visit, my parents will tell him and have him come over. I have no intentions of reconciling with him, as he did some horrible things to me 20 years ago which I can never forgive him for.
With my parents, things don't get through unless I take drastic measures. How do I go about conveying my desires not to see him? My plan would be to tell them they have to tell him he can't come to their house while I'm there, and if they don't respect my wishes, I simply won't see them. And that my parents can't just say they want to see me and not respect my conditions for the visit. I wanted your perspective on how I can "lay down the law" and enforce it.
– Unwelcome Home
( Read more... )
*****
2. Dear Annie: I'm 28 and recently moved back in with my parents to save money after a tough breakup. I'm grateful for the support, but I'm having trouble with my mom's behavior. She constantly comments on my weight, how I dress, or how much I'm on my phone. Last week, she said I'd have "better luck" if I wore makeup and "put myself out there more."
I've tried brushing it off, but it's starting to wear me down. I've asked her, gently, to stop making comments about my appearance, but she just laughs and says she's "trying to help." My dad usually stays quiet or tells me not to be so sensitive.
I really want to move out, but I can't afford to just yet. Do I have to suffer through the next few months or is there a way to get through to her? -- Tired Daughter in Transition
( Read more... )
***********
3. Dear Annie: My wife and I visit our daughter, son-in-law and granddaughter two or three times a year for about three days each visit. It's a five- to six-hour drive for us. Both my wife and I have severe asthma primarily from cat allergies, and we struggle with wheezing and irritated eyes every time we visit. My SIL has cat allergies, too.
Recently, their cat died (finally), and I urged my daughter to consider not getting another one. I explained our situation clearly, stating that if she did so, we'd have to stay at a hotel or B&B during future visits. She just got two more cats.
What would you think? -- Allergic and Angry
( Read more... )
************
4. Dear Annie: My husband, "Keith," and I have been married for 12 years. We've always been a team when it comes to parenting our two kids, ages 9 and 6, but lately I've noticed a shift. Keith has become increasingly harsh with them, especially our oldest, "Ben." He'll snap over small things -- like a jacket left on the floor or a missed chore -- and his tone has turned cold and critical.
I've brought it up several times, but Keith insists he's "just trying to teach them responsibility." I understand that, but I worry he's doing more harm than good. Ben has started shutting down emotionally, and our younger one is now walking on eggshells.
When I try to step in and soften things, Keith accuses me of "undermining" him. I'm stuck between protecting my kids and maintaining a united front as parents. I've suggested counseling, but he refuses, saying we don't need it.
How do I support my children without turning this into a bigger conflict between me and my husband? And how do I get Keith to see that his approach may be damaging? -- Worried Wife and Mom
( Read more... )
**************
5. Dear Care and Feeding,
I was once an academic competition prodigy. I was one word away from making the National Spelling Bee. My family would always attend these events, including my sister. However, when my sister started her own events, like the middle school choir, my disdain for attending was quite obvious through my groans and moans. I was a high schooler myself and quite self-centered. At her graduation, I volunteered not to go and opted instead to meet them at the restaurant where we would be celebrating.
I was 100 percent wrong for doing this. Now I am two years out of college, and my sister is almost done with her undergraduate degree. Since then, we haven’t really talked, though things are mostly cordial between us. I can count the conversations I’ve had with her since I turned 18 on one hand. My sister frequently states that when she makes it out, she probably will be a stranger to the family, and she doesn’t respond a lot to my parents or other family when they contact her. I admit that we don’t have many common interests, and I don’t know much about her, but it feels wrong not to be close to your own sister. Is there anything I can do, or is this relationship beyond repair?
—Is There a Chance?
( Read more... )
*****
6. Dear Care and Feeding,
In the ‘70s and ‘80s, my learning disabilities were undiagnosed, and I was the “stupid” one in the family. As an adult, I know myself to be very intelligent, but my siblings never realized this, and they have passed on their attitudes to their school-age children.
The kids do not believe me when I speak to them about current events or anything fact-based. When they ask an adult at large to spell something, and I reply, they check my response with another adult. I told one of them a medical fact, and they told me flatly that their parent was much, much smarter, and their parent said otherwise, so I must be wrong. (The fact that I do not work due to a medical issue probably contributes to their perception of me as extremely unintelligent.)
My siblings think this is hilarious. I am hurt. I want to have a relationship with the kids while I still can. I have tried explaining learning disabilities and multiple intelligences to the kids, but I think they just see it as me lecturing them. I only see them every few months anyway. Is this battle even worth fighting? If so, how?
—The Uncle
( Read more... )
*****
7. DEAR HARRIETTE: How do I get someone who believes in tough love to understand that that does not resonate with me? For a long time, my siblings and I have had strained relationships with our mom because of how crass she can be. She has strong and often negative opinions, and she is not shy about sharing them. I was recently admitted to a two-year college. I am in my late 20s and didn't prioritize college when I was 18 like my parents wanted.
Apparently, there's still some resentment there, because when I announced which school I'd be going to, my mom snickered and asked me if I was proud of that school. When she realized that she had offended me, she said that she was trying to encourage me. I can't keep letting her impose her negativity on me. Mocking me is NOT encouragement. I don't know how to get her to see that, though. -- Never Good Enough
( Read more... )
****
8. DEAR HARRIETTE: I recently got into a heated argument with my dad, and it's been bothering me ever since. The fight started when I told him I wanted to move to a different city for a job opportunity. He criticized my decision, saying I was being reckless and that I should stay closer to home where things are "safe" and familiar. I tried to explain why this move was important for my career and independence, but he kept bringing up past choices he didn't agree with, like leaving my old job and choosing a career path he hadn't expected. Before I knew it, I was yelling back, telling him that I need to make my own decisions and that his constant criticism feels controlling.
We haven't spoken in a few days, and I feel a mix of frustration, guilt and sadness. I love my dad and value his opinion, but I feel like he doesn't trust me to make my own choices. I want to reach out and repair our relationship, but I don't want to be the only one apologizing if he doesn't acknowledge his role in the argument. How do I approach him in a way that expresses my feelings honestly while also opening the door for reconciliation? Is it possible to set boundaries and stand firm on my decisions without damaging our relationship further? -- Dad Divide
( Read more... )
My brother doesn't live with my parents, but he lives in the same city my parents do. If I visit, my parents will tell him and have him come over. I have no intentions of reconciling with him, as he did some horrible things to me 20 years ago which I can never forgive him for.
With my parents, things don't get through unless I take drastic measures. How do I go about conveying my desires not to see him? My plan would be to tell them they have to tell him he can't come to their house while I'm there, and if they don't respect my wishes, I simply won't see them. And that my parents can't just say they want to see me and not respect my conditions for the visit. I wanted your perspective on how I can "lay down the law" and enforce it.
– Unwelcome Home
( Read more... )
2. Dear Annie: I'm 28 and recently moved back in with my parents to save money after a tough breakup. I'm grateful for the support, but I'm having trouble with my mom's behavior. She constantly comments on my weight, how I dress, or how much I'm on my phone. Last week, she said I'd have "better luck" if I wore makeup and "put myself out there more."
I've tried brushing it off, but it's starting to wear me down. I've asked her, gently, to stop making comments about my appearance, but she just laughs and says she's "trying to help." My dad usually stays quiet or tells me not to be so sensitive.
I really want to move out, but I can't afford to just yet. Do I have to suffer through the next few months or is there a way to get through to her? -- Tired Daughter in Transition
( Read more... )
3. Dear Annie: My wife and I visit our daughter, son-in-law and granddaughter two or three times a year for about three days each visit. It's a five- to six-hour drive for us. Both my wife and I have severe asthma primarily from cat allergies, and we struggle with wheezing and irritated eyes every time we visit. My SIL has cat allergies, too.
Recently, their cat died (finally), and I urged my daughter to consider not getting another one. I explained our situation clearly, stating that if she did so, we'd have to stay at a hotel or B&B during future visits. She just got two more cats.
What would you think? -- Allergic and Angry
( Read more... )
4. Dear Annie: My husband, "Keith," and I have been married for 12 years. We've always been a team when it comes to parenting our two kids, ages 9 and 6, but lately I've noticed a shift. Keith has become increasingly harsh with them, especially our oldest, "Ben." He'll snap over small things -- like a jacket left on the floor or a missed chore -- and his tone has turned cold and critical.
I've brought it up several times, but Keith insists he's "just trying to teach them responsibility." I understand that, but I worry he's doing more harm than good. Ben has started shutting down emotionally, and our younger one is now walking on eggshells.
When I try to step in and soften things, Keith accuses me of "undermining" him. I'm stuck between protecting my kids and maintaining a united front as parents. I've suggested counseling, but he refuses, saying we don't need it.
How do I support my children without turning this into a bigger conflict between me and my husband? And how do I get Keith to see that his approach may be damaging? -- Worried Wife and Mom
( Read more... )
5. Dear Care and Feeding,
I was once an academic competition prodigy. I was one word away from making the National Spelling Bee. My family would always attend these events, including my sister. However, when my sister started her own events, like the middle school choir, my disdain for attending was quite obvious through my groans and moans. I was a high schooler myself and quite self-centered. At her graduation, I volunteered not to go and opted instead to meet them at the restaurant where we would be celebrating.
I was 100 percent wrong for doing this. Now I am two years out of college, and my sister is almost done with her undergraduate degree. Since then, we haven’t really talked, though things are mostly cordial between us. I can count the conversations I’ve had with her since I turned 18 on one hand. My sister frequently states that when she makes it out, she probably will be a stranger to the family, and she doesn’t respond a lot to my parents or other family when they contact her. I admit that we don’t have many common interests, and I don’t know much about her, but it feels wrong not to be close to your own sister. Is there anything I can do, or is this relationship beyond repair?
—Is There a Chance?
( Read more... )
6. Dear Care and Feeding,
In the ‘70s and ‘80s, my learning disabilities were undiagnosed, and I was the “stupid” one in the family. As an adult, I know myself to be very intelligent, but my siblings never realized this, and they have passed on their attitudes to their school-age children.
The kids do not believe me when I speak to them about current events or anything fact-based. When they ask an adult at large to spell something, and I reply, they check my response with another adult. I told one of them a medical fact, and they told me flatly that their parent was much, much smarter, and their parent said otherwise, so I must be wrong. (The fact that I do not work due to a medical issue probably contributes to their perception of me as extremely unintelligent.)
My siblings think this is hilarious. I am hurt. I want to have a relationship with the kids while I still can. I have tried explaining learning disabilities and multiple intelligences to the kids, but I think they just see it as me lecturing them. I only see them every few months anyway. Is this battle even worth fighting? If so, how?
—The Uncle
( Read more... )
7. DEAR HARRIETTE: How do I get someone who believes in tough love to understand that that does not resonate with me? For a long time, my siblings and I have had strained relationships with our mom because of how crass she can be. She has strong and often negative opinions, and she is not shy about sharing them. I was recently admitted to a two-year college. I am in my late 20s and didn't prioritize college when I was 18 like my parents wanted.
Apparently, there's still some resentment there, because when I announced which school I'd be going to, my mom snickered and asked me if I was proud of that school. When she realized that she had offended me, she said that she was trying to encourage me. I can't keep letting her impose her negativity on me. Mocking me is NOT encouragement. I don't know how to get her to see that, though. -- Never Good Enough
( Read more... )
8. DEAR HARRIETTE: I recently got into a heated argument with my dad, and it's been bothering me ever since. The fight started when I told him I wanted to move to a different city for a job opportunity. He criticized my decision, saying I was being reckless and that I should stay closer to home where things are "safe" and familiar. I tried to explain why this move was important for my career and independence, but he kept bringing up past choices he didn't agree with, like leaving my old job and choosing a career path he hadn't expected. Before I knew it, I was yelling back, telling him that I need to make my own decisions and that his constant criticism feels controlling.
We haven't spoken in a few days, and I feel a mix of frustration, guilt and sadness. I love my dad and value his opinion, but I feel like he doesn't trust me to make my own choices. I want to reach out and repair our relationship, but I don't want to be the only one apologizing if he doesn't acknowledge his role in the argument. How do I approach him in a way that expresses my feelings honestly while also opening the door for reconciliation? Is it possible to set boundaries and stand firm on my decisions without damaging our relationship further? -- Dad Divide
( Read more... )
Friday 14/11/2025
Nov. 14th, 2025 11:52 amdark_kana posting in 3_good_things_a_day1) a day to Ghent with my mum
2) with 2 photo exhibitions
3) and lunch and dinner
Geez, this dude....
Nov. 14th, 2025 05:19 amconuly posting in agonyauntDear Eric: Over the course of our 26-year marriage I have caught my wife in numerous lies. We started marriage counseling three months ago and during an early session I asked if we could finally be truthful with each other, no more lies. No such luck.
Years ago, her brother suddenly fled and left all his belongings. She put them in storage but when I found out I told her to remove them or have him pay the monthly fee. Today I discovered she has been paying for her brother’s monthly storage bill for at least 10 years without my knowledge. That comes to $16,500. It may even be higher.
Initially she said she was being reimbursed. I asked for proof. She said she would show me. Then she changed her story to say it's her money and she can spend it however she chooses, so forget the proof. Pretty sure there never was any proof of reimbursement. My wife believes the best defense is to go on the offense, and she does it a lot.
I am married to a liar, a sneak, someone with no conscience. What should I do?
– Deceived Again
( Read more... )
Years ago, her brother suddenly fled and left all his belongings. She put them in storage but when I found out I told her to remove them or have him pay the monthly fee. Today I discovered she has been paying for her brother’s monthly storage bill for at least 10 years without my knowledge. That comes to $16,500. It may even be higher.
Initially she said she was being reimbursed. I asked for proof. She said she would show me. Then she changed her story to say it's her money and she can spend it however she chooses, so forget the proof. Pretty sure there never was any proof of reimbursement. My wife believes the best defense is to go on the offense, and she does it a lot.
I am married to a liar, a sneak, someone with no conscience. What should I do?
– Deceived Again
( Read more... )
(no subject)
Nov. 14th, 2025 03:50 amconuly posting in agonyauntMy 5-year-old daughter, “Wren,” has been a nail-biter for the past six months. Nothing my husband and I tried could break her of the habit. Then miraculously, she stopped. When I mentioned my relief to my mother-in-law, she took credit for it. Then she told me her “solution.”
She told Wren that her hair would fall out if she kept biting her nails! I’m not sure how to feel about this. On the one hand, I’m pissed my mother-in-law would lie to my daughter. On the other hand, it worked. Do I need to tell Wren the truth, or can my husband and I (at least for the time being) keep up the ruse?
—Something to Chew On
( WTF )
She told Wren that her hair would fall out if she kept biting her nails! I’m not sure how to feel about this. On the one hand, I’m pissed my mother-in-law would lie to my daughter. On the other hand, it worked. Do I need to tell Wren the truth, or can my husband and I (at least for the time being) keep up the ruse?
—Something to Chew On
( WTF )
(no subject)
Nov. 14th, 2025 01:08 amconuly posting in agonyauntDear Carolyn: I recently completed a major renovation project to my backyard, and my mother expressed disappointment that I haven’t invited her over to see it. I told her I was waiting to do a big unveiling, but the truth — which I confessed to my brother — is that I’m anxious about her opinion because she and I have different tastes.
She is the type of person who will always compliment you verbally, but you can often tell by her expression how she really feels. I described her as rather fake, but my brother said I am being unfair. He pointed out that I could be accused of being equally judgmental by holding against someone not their words and actions, but my own belief about what’s going on inside their head, whether or not it’s true. I had never thought of it that way.
My brother never seems to care about other people’s opinions. I’d like to try his mindset, which seems very freeing, but I don’t know how. It’s especially hard to embrace the idea that I’m supposed to just let it slide when I feel silently critiqued or when someone is only being nice to my face.
Am I oversensitive? Then what’s the right level of sensitivity? Any tips for me?
( Read more... )
She is the type of person who will always compliment you verbally, but you can often tell by her expression how she really feels. I described her as rather fake, but my brother said I am being unfair. He pointed out that I could be accused of being equally judgmental by holding against someone not their words and actions, but my own belief about what’s going on inside their head, whether or not it’s true. I had never thought of it that way.
My brother never seems to care about other people’s opinions. I’d like to try his mindset, which seems very freeing, but I don’t know how. It’s especially hard to embrace the idea that I’m supposed to just let it slide when I feel silently critiqued or when someone is only being nice to my face.
Am I oversensitive? Then what’s the right level of sensitivity? Any tips for me?
( Read more... )
Thursday Recs
Nov. 13th, 2025 08:50 pmsoc_puppet posting in queerly_belovedComing back to your reading page once again, it's Thursday Recs!
Do you have a rec for this week? Just reply to this post with something queer or queer-adjacent (such as, soap made by a queer person that isn't necessarily queer themed) that you'd, well, recommend. Self-recs are welcome, as are recs for fandom-related content!
Or have you tried something that's been recced here? Do you have your own report to share about it? I'd love to hear about it!
Do you have a rec for this week? Just reply to this post with something queer or queer-adjacent (such as, soap made by a queer person that isn't necessarily queer themed) that you'd, well, recommend. Self-recs are welcome, as are recs for fandom-related content!
Or have you tried something that's been recced here? Do you have your own report to share about it? I'd love to hear about it!
Thursday 13/11/2025
Nov. 13th, 2025 01:56 pmdark_kana posting in 3_good_things_a_day1) a day at the office with almost all the colleagues. It's good to see them all again
2) my parents are coming over for dinner
3) going swimming this evening
multifandom icons.
Nov. 12th, 2025 09:00 pmwickedgame posting in iconicFandoms: 9-1-1, 9-1-1: Lone Star, Chilling Adventures of Sabrina, Cobra Kai, DOC - Nelle Tue Mani, Maxton Hall, Romil & Jugal, Suits, Supergirl, The Wheel of Time, Weak Hero, Yellowstone
rest HERE @mundodefieras
rest HERE @
mundodefieras Wednesday 12/11/2025
Nov. 12th, 2025 11:04 amdark_kana posting in 3_good_things_a_day1) going for a walk in the sunshine during lunchbreak
2) hubby's father is staying over for dinner
3) hubby gave me a back/shoulder massage. My muscles are way too tense...
~You'll have to leave it with my secretary since my torso was just scissored in half
Nov. 11th, 2025 07:41 pmzarlaIt's been two weeks since the surgery now! I should've been posting daily updates really but I DID take pictures every day to keep track of how it was doing! I took him in to get the last stitches taken out today and he's healing very well, very alert, eating and drinking good, all good news! His other eye seems to be fine too, although they haven't gotten back to me about the pathology on that yet. He DOES have some redness at the corner of his eye though, so I'm going to have to put ointment on them and keep the cone on him another week. He's so close to being free though!
Anyway, DO YOU WANT CAT PICTURES of course you do! Of a cat post-eye surgery? Well maybe not as much. They're not gory or anything! It's just a stitched incision healing up. If you're squeamish about that though maybe give this a pass? It slowly gets more and more normal by the day, haha. It was mostly a quiet two weeks, except for one day...
( did i INTRIGUE YOU )
lj post
Anyway, DO YOU WANT CAT PICTURES of course you do! Of a cat post-eye surgery? Well maybe not as much. They're not gory or anything! It's just a stitched incision healing up. If you're squeamish about that though maybe give this a pass? It slowly gets more and more normal by the day, haha. It was mostly a quiet two weeks, except for one day...
( did i INTRIGUE YOU )
lj post
Eleventh of the Eleventh.
Nov. 11th, 2025 09:15 pmhannahOne of my clients tasked me to do some computer work for her - it's something I'm doing from my apartment so it's less than the usual rate, and as it's something I'm doing from my apartment, I'm genuinely fine with that. It involves checking to see if her webpage is up to date, going through and seeing if each page that lists certain January events has those events listed on the January masterpost in turn, or if the masterpost for each month is missing certain items.
To keep track of everything as I went, I made a spreadsheet to stay organized. After a couple hours, I sent it her way to make sure I was doing it right from the get-go and wouldn't need to redo more than a couple of hours. She said the work I was doing was fine, and to compile all the missing masterpost items when I was done, but she was confused by the spreadsheet. I explained it to her, and she said that wasn't the issue: she understood what I was doing, it was that she'd never used a spreadsheet.
I understand her professional life began and ended before spreadsheets became a thing, but I hadn't thought she'd never used one. Even as a way to keep track of addresses or manage a list with a lot of moving parts. I'm inclined to believe her that she's been informed they exist and she's simply never had reason to bother.
In some ways, I envy and admire that.
To keep track of everything as I went, I made a spreadsheet to stay organized. After a couple hours, I sent it her way to make sure I was doing it right from the get-go and wouldn't need to redo more than a couple of hours. She said the work I was doing was fine, and to compile all the missing masterpost items when I was done, but she was confused by the spreadsheet. I explained it to her, and she said that wasn't the issue: she understood what I was doing, it was that she'd never used a spreadsheet.
I understand her professional life began and ended before spreadsheets became a thing, but I hadn't thought she'd never used one. Even as a way to keep track of addresses or manage a list with a lot of moving parts. I'm inclined to believe her that she's been informed they exist and she's simply never had reason to bother.
In some ways, I envy and admire that.
